To this devotion, I am a servant. In even the most stoic of men; the fine print of transcripts and scriptures of rational thinking – a world is occurring before these eyes that dwell on the faint mascara trails. Her blackened eyelids, morning eyes that vibrate at the thought of a dawn of another day. She does not know that the vibration of my eyes are given light by the contextual life that we find ourselves in. It’s past midnight, we walk the streets as guards. Yet the only thing we ever guard is our hearts – if we are wise. We stop before a house that should be standing, alone, far away in the deep greenery of village seclusion. A misfit amongst the surrounding hotels and bars. There is a tree and a faint street light, its rays omitted from the nucleus of the tree’s platform. Underneath the summer leaves, the intimate progression of palms around waists and the weight of Erôs. Lips caressing lips. Now I know why we never kiss with our eyes open. We do not feel with open eyes. We feel with blind, sacred passion. I read what the contemporaries write, about the conceptions of what it means to have chemistry personified. They exclude the fauvism of human art. Of modern, soulful intimacy. The edges are blunt. We cannot narrow such a thing down to a few words. As though Plato never spoke of his theories on desire and emotion, how this fire that runs through us is like a disease. In his words; every heart sings a song, incomplete, until another heart whispers back. Those who wish to sing always find a song. At the touch of a lover, everyone becomes a poet.
I see the skin of this woman. Bare before my morning eyes. Pale as the light that rests on blanco walls. Softness is her essence. Her red hair; the fragrance of entire summers. She stands as a statue with the windows open, absorbing the fluidity of the city views. Colours between shadows. Exclusive noise, airing through modern transmissions of music. Small baubles of light, their microscopic rays shining through the creme room. Comets of fire endowed by ginger aromas. The heat of candlelight. Increasing temperatures. Firm beatings of the heart. My lips, on the border of her inner thighs – each pore on the surface of her skin is coronated as a regal feature. A regal woman with the affirmation of aristocracy. Subtleness which only the divine can assemble. Now she lays wondrous on the silk bedding. Reddened lips, like two slices of plums softly basking in the summer light. Midnight has overtaken our hearts and now we lay as two lovers, not knowing that the end is near. At times how I long for its return. To touch your lips – for just one more night.
Have you ever looked,
at a woman,
so cordial in her essence?
You feel as though,
could hinder her sunlit portrait.
continues to play;
where you inevitably taint this pristine brush.
that has never truly been held,
in an artists soft,
and passionate grip.
that has yet to absorb,
every coloured emotion,
under the dynastic sun.
that has never loved,
until the principles of sanity,
have been brought under question.
And I have finally come to realise,
why intimacy is a burden,
upon my soul.
The first steps,
towards an intimate bond,
are the most arduous,
I will ever have to take.
Give me war.
Give me hardship.
Give me pain.
But do not give me the power,
to decide her fate.
that her perfected perceptions,
may eventually break.
For I have tainted,
too many pristine brushes,
in my wake.
So I remain an artist,
without a brush to paint.
I remember the days when I used to hold her in arms. A fragile flower surrendering her eyes to my heart. Yet in truth, we were really worlds apart. The mind how it tricks the most sweetest of loves and doubt becomes the general that crushes the soul. Unable to picture our romance ever growing old. At the embryonic stage of every relationship, is a power you believe will resist any struggle. Those were the days where love was blind and guidance was lacking. If time could be reversed my name would be first on that list. As I walk through the city I feel the wind cutting my skin. Nature has a way of inflicting the most minor of pains. We would walk along the river bed, the birds reciting their hymns. I would fall back to admire this beauty in all of her sins.
Trees bemoan the season of autumn. Every time it comes around. A of its existence, falls to the ground. Leaving it vulnerable, cold and dazed. Like a broken soul, when the heart breaks. Slowly as the seasons change. The tree begins to breathe again. So when you’re left, exposed by love. remember the naked tree, in the winter sun.
I remember walking into a shadowy metropolis bar. Along the capital’s veins. Where fluorescent lights flickered like far worlds descending. The jazz blue. The marvel green. The impassioned red. Decorating the revellers crescent faces. Separated by the charcoaled darkness and coloured beams. On the faces of empowered youth. Nonchalant eyes wandered through the flow of cosmic sound. I made my way past vibrant bodies that the music had possessed in desire. Neglecting the musical twitch conquering my own. The embittered gin introducing itself to the state of the mind as I caught a glimpse of her face for the very first time. Her sclera, overshadowing, the dark essence of her iris and her pupil. A panther, in her elegance. Ruled by mystique, and by fire. With a royal confidence, she approached. In Mediterranean voice; she whispered a sensual verse close to my ear. Death black curls, thicker than rope. Strawberry lips, enriched to capture the eye of anyone who sought to gaze at her regal stature. For is this not what this world, it seeks? A night of lust? A voice to speak? Explorations through, foreign bodies and beds. To immerse in pleasure To immerse in pleasure. Until death.
unbeknown, to the destiny of ways. two souls, part. down roads, never made. the lavender night, in its implacable essence. greets two lovers, on the border, between separate paths. her weighted head, rests, against his tiring shoulders. in silence they breathe, as the commotion, of the city fades. if only they could see, their own reflection. in the winter’s haze, by towers of glass. see how their bodies mould, into inconceivable art. Maybe then, would their hearts, conceive intention. a modern tale, where romance withers. with no resistance, from either side. they make their way, down different roads. too endless, and alien. for both their sights.
Her forced smiles were intrinsic. Forged lips, enslaved by her thoughts. Hollow cheeks, strained by continuous contractions. Deep dimples, as if two bullets had left eternal wounds on her mellow face. Eye contact became redundant. Admiring stares, turned into glares of hopelessness. It was as though she was scarred of the future. For she could envision happiness, a far dream to her. Afraid. So, so, afraid. There remained an ample resistance behind her retina. Distorted visions, induced her will, to erode. Along with her heart. Her mind built barriers, so that the soul would stay. Yet the waves of uncertainty and bitterness obliterated them over night. We would awake from stillness. Witnessing our world, weeping in its ruins.
Like a soldiered anchor, stationed on the crystal blue shore. In the luminous ocean, by a sacred land. My love for you awaits. I am buried under your achilles heel, my ship. Consumed by all that can destroy, you and I. It has been months since I held you down. Staring into tortuous nights, with the knowledge that you are not in the proximity of my strength. Oh my precious ship. I know that you are designed to withstand the most ferocious storms of this earth. Yet, I cannot absorb the image of your wreckage by some strange and distant land. My reach, cannot stretch that far and wide to feel your imperial presence. For if you do not return home, to the crystal blue shore where I lay in wait. The weight of this ocean, will not evade my might. I will free myself from this ancient port and roam the grey bed of the sea. To lay beside, your ruptured ruins.